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Pass the Pigs


The Silicone Seems To Be Seeping Somewhere


he's a plastic surgery super hero
and then there's me and my bruised ego
bulging briefs look at all that man meat
no way dude i just can't compete

sing a song of silicone
liposuction hormone
a chemical reaction that will make your mate moan
it looks and feels just like it's real
put a fake rack on that rump
viagra and a penis pump

they are the botox king and queen
their life it was nothing
now her breasts look their best
and his manhood passed the test
who's gonna notice if your attitude smells
with these visual effects you bought someone's gonna wanna ring wedding bells
or at least watch you play swords
to impress wonder woman her expression still bored
i'm hideous when i'm not poised for tv
ron jeremy fills the screen with his personality
it has me so upset my mind snaps
what i do
i drink a secret potion
it's just for you
got to get your attention my poor friends cry
news cameras roll i've got tears
in my eyes lights camera action my beautiful son
now i guess she'll have to notice and if not
i guess it's my conundrum

being humdrum my biggest fear
now i'm forgotten bulging tights make the girls draw near
i'm like a 90 pound weakling sand kicked in my face
i need some comfort here or words of kind embrace
i'm like the loser in the battle three way love song
now everything in this human realm seems to be too long
except for my dong

i just turned traitor for a piece of tail
and wonder woman doesn't notice how i boast and flail
i took my poor friend hostage that's when i went wrong
in my pursuit of surface beauty it all leads back to my dang ding
because of my -- pardon my french
dang ding dong
because of my dog gone dang ding dong